This week I had a spiritual direction meeting, which essentially means I meet with someone to help guide me in my spiritual/prayer life wherever I need. Something we did this week was to focus on the words “The Lord is my shepherd, I have everything I need.” We would take a deep breath in, “the Lord is my shepherd,” and breathe out, “I have everything I need.” I thought it sounded a little silly at first, I’m not usually good at the quiet, breathing meditation exercises to be totally honest, but focusing on that simple truth was actually really good for me. Of course I believe God provides everything I need, but it’s still hard when you don’t see where your needs are going to come from. I flew back to the states for a week earlier this month, it was a last minute decision and definitely not planned. I felt like while I was glad I was able to go home, I wasn’t getting things done that I wanted to. As soon as I got back, Christian and I went on a vacation for a few days that we had planned for a little bit, and the day we got back from that, the guesthouse was completely flooded, so then the following two days were spent cleaning it out. I had plans to work on personal things, and as you can probably imagine with all of that, most of them didn’t get done. I didn’t get to work on projects I wanted to do, or set up my furniture or clear out the clutter that’s been piling up or work on my classwork or work on raising more support. I needed time to do that, but other things came first and that stressed me out. But if it’s true that I have everything I need, then maybe I need to focus on the Lord provided during the two weeks that my plans didn’t work out. First, he provided a way for me to get home last minute, he provided smooth and stress free travel days, and time with my close friends and family. He provided time with people I have missed, he provided encouragement through people I barely even knew, gave them the words to speak life into me, he provided reminders about the importance of community and how I’ve already learned how to grow a community and have the tools for that. When I got back and went on a trip with Christian, he provided rest and a break from the busyness. I have everything I need; I didn’t need to get the things on my to-do list done, as important as they felt, but what I did need was provided. If the Lord is my shepherd, then I am a sheep; sheep, you may or may have heard, are generally not very smart. They lack the ability to survive on their own, without their shepherd, they will get lost and wander into danger, they don’t have much strength, they aren’t able to fight off predators. Sheep with a shepherd however, are safe, they have everything they need, they are protected, fed, and sheltered from danger. They recognize their shepherd and know his voice, if they stray he finds them and carries them back to safety. I am a sheep, when I think I can do this on my own, I am wandering away, walking right into danger and have reason to fear. When I trust in my shepherd, however, I am guided, I know where to go and I can listen to his voice. I am safe and have everything I need. I needed this reminder, and the reminder that there will always be a list of things to do, the list is inevitably ever-growing, and it’s not bad to plan and try to manage time well, but more than that we need to be present in the moment and listen to our shepherd’s voice, focus on what he is providing us today, and trust that we will have everything we need tomorrow.
This month was a little difficult. My grandma, we call her Grammi, passed away which was difficult for me, this is why I made a last minute trip home. Grammi is a person who was there with me through a lot of difficult times when I was a very young child, and as I grew up, she taught me a lot of important lessons. It’s still hard grieving her, but I know she is with Jesus and has been reunited with my grandpa, who passed away nearly three years ago, and imagining them together again without any pain is a really nice thought. I could talk about her for hours, but I will save that today, if anyone is interested in hearing more about about who Grammi was, I have a post about her on my Facebook; this is one of the times I’m actually very thankful for social media, because after getting to highlight some of my favorite memories of Grammi in a Facebook post, people commented more stories about her, some people I knew, some I did not, but I enjoyed reading all the comments and messages about how special and loved she was by so many, it made me feel so much comfort to read about her impact. She was very special to me, and I will continue to miss her dearly, but her memory is kept alive by so many wonderful people.
While I was home, I made sure to eat at one of our favorite restaurants, a Mexican restaurant we went to frequently. The photo above is actually from the last time Christian and I went with Grammi. I made sure to order all her usuals, and I can confirm she has very good taste- in pretty much everything.
It was nice to be home and attend her celebration of life, and be with family for a little bit. I really enjoyed spending time with my sister and seeing a few close friends. I didn’t realize it ahead of time, but the Fulton County Fair was going on while I was there, so I went a couple of times, which was fun. One day, I went to the fair and then went shopping with my friend, Alyssa. We spent the whole day together, catching up and hanging out. I attended Hayat Jadida, the ministry I used to be very involved in, for a Bible study, and I really connected with the people there, both new and old faces. I saw a lot of people at church, which I was really grateful for. And I spent a day with my sister at the fair, then came back home for a Monster High movie marathon (a childhood favorite) and to eat Buldak ramen, rice, and dumplings (also some of our favorite foods). My week went by really fast, but it was so encouraging at the same time. When I got back from the US, Christian picked me up at the airport in Santo Domingo, and then we drove up to Las Terrenas on the North coast for a vacation. We stayed at a really nice resort with a beautiful beach and enjoyed some amazing food. I also spent a lot of time reading at the beach or by the pool. As you can see from some of the photos below, we witnessed some beautiful sunsets, though the pictures don’t do justice to how gorgeous the sky was.
The evening we got back to San Juan, there had been storms, and the guesthouse was flooded up to my knees with dirty water. We picked Domino’s for dinner because there was no way we were going to stand in that kitchen and try to cook anything. The days that followed were spent with our staff cleaning up the mess after the water receded. It turned out to be long days of sweeping water out of rooms, raking out debris, and discovering just how much was completely covered in layers of mud.
Aside from those adventures, I’ve been into crafting lately, working on projects for our room, and I have spent a good amount of time reading as well. I went to Santo Domingo with Kelsi one day to go to IKEA and get some furniture. We ended up buying some shelves and finding a really great deal on a table and some chairs.
Christian has a lung infection and went to the doctor this week and got a bunch of medicine to fight that and stop the spread. He’s been sick for about a week and a half so prayers for his health are much appreciated.
More Prayer Requests:
- Grace and patience as we deal with various stress and frustrations
- Madison grieving the loss of Grammi
- Christian’s health
