Where Does My Help Come From?

It’s been a long month, I feel like so much has happened, yet also nothing sometimes. I’m still learning to balance everything. Most of the time I feel like I’m good, I can at least not let the personal stuff get in the way of the work I’m trying to do, but recently I think I’ve hit my limit and as soon as I start to feel comfortable in what I’m doing, I start to feel the weight of everything, and it’s getting harder to push through it. Towards the end of this month I know I’ve been moving slower, not getting enough sleep, and struggling with brain fog. A lot is going on back at home and I’m not there to help, I’m having to learn how to “be there” for people without being able to actually be there. I feel bad to even say that I’m having a hard time because in some way everyone is, and I chose to be here so I feel like I shouldn’t ever complain, but some good friends have reminded me that I can love it here, and say I’m struggling at the same time. The Lord has been faithful, and I know he will continue to be, I’ve seen this in so many ways just this week. I have seen God through the encouragement of my friends and coworkers, like a text I received from a good friend reminding me to look to the mountains and remember where my help comes from. My meditation lately has been reflecting a lot on God’s faithfulness and casting my anxieties on him. There are so many things I’m worried about, but the Lord who made heaven and earth is where my help comes from, and that brings me joy in the midst of chaos.

Even though it feels like there is a lot of chaos happening, there has been so much good, too, I’ve seen the Lord work in so many wonderful ways.

With the summer season comes teams leading worship in the mornings, which has been so nice. Worshiping with others to start our day brings me so much joy, and I’ve been soaking it in while I can.

The first week of June we were still in the States, enjoying snuggles from my cat, grilling steak, and hanging out with friends and family. I got to see my sister’s final dance recital, in which she looked incredible, and I enjoyed making her a custom bouquet as a gift. I was also given a Macbook while I was home, of which I am beyond grateful for, and it has been incredibly helpful for many things. Our trip home was quick but it was so nice to see everyone.

Arriving back in the DR we dove straight into work, working with VBS teams, lots to do around the guesthouse, and Christian has been helping more with the construction project, driving the team where they need to go and helping them at the site.

We got to work with our home church one week, so it was really nice to see some familiar faces and get to know some people more. For me it was nice remembering my first trip with them and being able to look back on how God’s brought me to where I am today, from where I was four years ago, on my first mission trip ever.

We’ve been to Santo Domingo a few times since we’ve been back, so we’ve enjoyed some extra time with a couple of the teams and even went to a nicer dinner while we were there one night, to celebrate our second anniversary.

We’ve gotten to spend more time with and get to know Hannah and Alejandro as well as their children, all of whom have been a joy to have here at the guest house.

We went to the pool with Kelsi and Bianca to relax a little bit one day recently, which was very nice and much needed.